Thursday, November 29, 2007

Homecoming '07

Adrian and I will be departing Auckland tomorrow morning for Nadi where the beautiful Fijian Islands await us. We will spend 10 days there until we arrive back in Los Angeles on December 11.

I've already been asked to reflect on my time here in New Zealand and how it has affected me, but I honestly believe it is to soon. I'm still running around trying to pack, sell my car and make sure all my loose ends are tied up before departing. I know my time here has helped me, but I'm not entirely sure how.

Most importantly, I know I will be happy to return home to family, friends, and familiar surroundings. No matter how much you travel you always appreciate the flight home the best.

One Love

Monday, November 26, 2007

Hola

It has been about a month since I last filled you in on my trips. The first half of November I spent on my dissertation that I wrote on the work of Sports NGOs in developing and conflict societies. The second half of November I have been travelling around the South Island of New Zealand. Some highlights have included jumping out of a plane, boogie boarding through a river and witness Adrian walk up to a glacier that I could hear cracking and echoing through the valley.

Other than that things have been great. I will be back December 11th. HOLLLA

Monday, October 29, 2007

A Plea from an Exiled Los Angeles Sports Fan

Dear Boston Fans,

It looks like our fates our inversely related at this point. My Angels flutter out of the first round your Red Sox win the world series, making it back to back for times they've won the world series while I've been abroad. Our respective football teams are both undefeated, as in the Patriots haven't lost and LA doesn't have a team (although my jags are stumbling to stay in contention). My Lakers are in shambles behind the latest Kobe mood swing (also eerily similar to last time I was abroad and the Lakers traded Shaq) while your Celtics have the new big three. My sporting enthusiasm is at an all time low, i can only hope for a brighter light at the end of the tunnel. Everytime I leave home the sporting franchises of Southern California amazingly wither away. My final plea, Kobe please stay and we'll surround you with the talent necessary to win a title. I can't watch the Lakers trade the greatest player touching a basketball for a shooting guard shorter than me, and two more big men who just aren't quite good enough, with a swing man who has yet to emerge as anything more than a role player.

Sincerely,
Exiled LA Sport Fan

Catch Me I'm Ballin in New Zealand



Here's a video that should entertain. Enjoy.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

MIA

i'd like to say a special thank you to all those that take a lo0k at the blog. I apologize for being missing in action but i'm still in new zealand and still doing well. Writing a thesis on basketball NGOs and looking forward to comin home December 11. see you soon. 1 love

Monday, September 24, 2007

Ingredients for a bad day

A slight cold is always a great backdrop for a bad day. Not too sick though because that will just make you take the day off and focus on recovering. More suitable is a pesky running nose and low energy level as a result of being sick, thus you still try to accomplish everything, but can't.

Second mix in an overtime loss for the team your coaching. Such a loss becomes very frustrating and can add to the flavor of a bad day by when it occurs at the hands of a team you "should" have beat.

Third fill your down time with errands, such as calling the electric, internet and housing companies to sort out your new future living situation. These errands make sure you stay busy while cooking your favorite bad day.

And finally for presentation walk out to the parking lot where your car is supposed to be waiting for you and find it missing. For extra garnishment, make it a rent-a-car and make it happen when you obviously need to be somewhere else. That is surely to make your dish taste PHENOMENAL.

Yes, unfortunately, it has been one of those types of days. I try to put in perspective as I know that bad days happen and you just have to push through. Luckily for me I have had enough of them to know the sunsets on them just as the sunsets on good days. Another sunrise awaits me tommorow and hopefully I can cook something that is more to my liking.


'till next time
pEace

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

DIDDY

Diddy's Arrived in Auckland... thats it and a post and picture later to document my first tourny championship since high school

Sunday, September 9, 2007

Basketball is Life

Its been a while since I last wrote a meaningful entry in my blog. Well here it is, I love basketball. In college I used to leave up an away message that said, "Basketball is life." This simple phrase sticks with me today, even as I find myself in a country obsessed with Rugby during the Rugby World Cup, my life and social circle is made up of people that love the game of basketball. Life for me is simple, and luckily I've made that choice to focus much of what I love around basketball.

When I was young I spent hours upon hours playing basketball on a portable hoop positioned at the end of a culdesac. Those days were where I learned to love the game. As I got older I found a friend group that began with a guy I legitimately disliked, probably because he infringed on my territory as the leader of basketball at Diamond Point Elementary School. He moved into my school's neighborhood during 4th grade, bringing with him a competitive spirit that tested me over and over again. Once we played in his backyard to the death, like it resulted in several hard fouls including me getting shoved into the pole of another portable basketball court where I brought down the whole court. Competition ever since has been something I've never shied away from knowing that my skill set gives me a chance in any arena.

As I progressed into highschool I integrated myself into a group of guys that far exceeded the gym. We spent every moment together and basically planned other activities just to fill in the time between games, practices, open runs, shootarounds, and most importantly front yard battles. In college I found myself living out my dream, playing college basketball. This dream I never really mentioned to others, there was no need, I think it was a dream most of my friends shared. I wasn't sure if I really was going to achieve it or not. As a sophomore going into my junior year I tore up the UCLA basketball camp leaving as the second best player there, where I was awarded the defensive player of the week to go along with my team claiming the championship, but more importantly the assistant coach added that with continued work on my part I could be a college basketball player.

Even with this encouragement my dream of playing college basketball, inspired by Nick Van Exel's same dream of playing college basketball, still wasn't a tenable dream. I mean my senior year I averaged 10 points a game, hardly stellar numbers, I got recruited by two DIII schools Redlands legitimately and Chapman because they wanted my best friend. However, I had one other thing to balance, I was an intellect, I was carrying a 4.6 gpa, I needed to go to a school that met my profile. I somehow stumbled upon Pomona College, because we lost a game to Wilson a team I had never lost to before that game and was so upset I didn't want to go to school the next day. My mother being a teacher would never accept such an excuse, so I told her I would make a visit to a college, the Claremont Colleges being the only schools close enough that I hadn't really visited or known anything about were the excuse I needed.

Well I ended up visiting and even applied, only to Pomona on the whim of thinking well I'm from Pomona, so why not? It was only after my application was mailed in that I realized I just turned my application into the most selective school in the US. My college admissions essay that used the metaphor of a gym to lay out my story got me through the admission process and began visiting the different schools, Pomona being close allowed me to come up and play with the team in there open gym runs after the season ended and eat some meals in the dining hall. I looked at some schools up North and loved them, but never felt at home during the trips as I did when at Pomona. That comfort I didn't realize consciously, but it was basketball, the other schools simply didn't give me the opportunity to run up and down their gym, the most important facility a school could offer me. My girlfriend at the time after I told her I decided to go to Pomona responded, "I already knew that." I guess Pomona being the only place where I could continue my dream was really the only place I could have really ended up.

In college basketball taught me many more lessons. My first year was filled with arrogance and growing pains, but my sophomore year was essentially a beating. I basically got hit by the game everyday as it proved to be a season where it seemed no positive ground was made. I didn't see time on the court. After that I had to take a step back and realize once again although basketball was my passion, I'd have to be more creative than just simply playing to stay around the game. Thats when I went abroad as a way of escaping the game that had the previous year left me battered and searching. Hence basketball dictated for me where I went to college, supposedly the most critical choice one makes in life (if fortunate enough to make such a choice) and that I needed to go abroad. Before my sophomore year I wanted to go abroad, but knew that if I was doing well in basketball I would sacrifice the trip to stay and play. In many ways not playing my sophomore year made the decision to go abroad for me.

In South Africa although escaping competitive basketball for the first time since I was eleven, I didn't leave the game. I still played for UCT's basketball club team, and worked as a coach for Hoops4Hope. This experience made me balance the game with the other aspects of my life. I know those other aspects exist and center around some abstract conception of the good, being grounded in the ethical understanding of what a good life is, but I'm always more challenged in really using that as a guiding principle, so basketball has always remained my guiding light.

Most recently, basketball has led me here to New Zealand as part of my Rotary Ambassadorial Scholarship, where I've continued my work with basketball, as well as my education. I've continued to be shown different opportunities and am already working on my next move that involves basketball, we'll see where it leads me, I'm just excited because basketball hasn't led me astray yet.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Lupe Fiasco

I had the wonderful privilege of going to the Lupe Fiasco concert in Auckland this past Thursday. Lupe is my hero, the themes of his songs range from growing up in a single parent household to criticism of the current administrations foreign policies, to say it nicely. In every song though he approaches topics in a refreshing tone that brings out a new point of view. For example in the song he said she said, he takes the idea of a child growin up without his father. The first verse is told in the mother's voice, while the second verse is essentially the exact same lyrics, except altered so the speaker is the child himself. The power and depth of the verses forces the listener to delve into the topics of the feelings of abandonment, to the feelings of terror put into the world by our current administration.

As I babble in the above the truth is I'm in awe of what Lupe is able to say over a track that achieves commercial success. Even if his success is not in the same scale of that of 50cent (i'm about a dollar), just his voice is so strong. In writing a blog I attempt to find that truth in my voice. The move from that formal academic writing to the casual cool tone I use with friends. How am I supposed to sound in a blog? How do I produce a sound that is distinctly mine as Lupe's is his. Thats the constant struggle in keeping this blog. I thank those of you continuing to read and like I've told many of you I hope you find it interesting and entertaining.

So what I've captured is the first paragraph of this blog is bad (my apologies Lupe for not doing your performance or music justice), and the second although a stab at being good is more Luc Longley than the Dennis Rodman I would hope for (I say Dennis because he is always entertaining, remember when he took his shoes off during the game while on the Spurs?).

onE

Monday, August 13, 2007

Alarm Clocks and Cell Phones

Ok so my Samsung cell phone has taken its annual or should we qualify that to say semi-annual Peter McNeely dive (its crazy to think his bout with Tyson was in '95- I'm getting old). Why cell phones break after about 6 months of use is beyond me. I mean my first Motorola "peanut" phone worked for about two years until I got tired of paying pre-pay, which as a sidenote was 6 years ago and still cheaper at that time then the cost of a cell phone plan currently in New Zealand. Don't believe me, lets just say that my current prepay plan is at $1.21 a minute and that is to people in my Vodafone network. But lets not talk about the market failure of cell phones service here in New Zealand and get to the big issue with my phone not working.

I HAVE NO ALARM CLOCK. Its not a problem that I can't call anyone, I couldn't afford to do that anyways, I can get by without texting, but the fact that I can't use my alarm clock hurts. I've spent 15 minutes trying to come to a solution. For a real time play by play read the conversation that appears below:

p.s. If you happen to be reading this at about 1 p.m. pacific standard time on Monday 13th of August 2007, go ahead and give me a call on my Vonage, just to make sure my new alarm clock I downloaded off the internet worked.

p.s. #2 Why don't computers come with alarm clocks anyways, you tellin me that doesnt fit I can have something that colors the covers of CDs but not an alarm? I guess I'm just tired and confused.

me: you wanna here some funny stuff

my cell phone

's buttons are broke so I cant text message talk or even set my alarm so I have to wait for my computer to download an alarm clock program just so i can wake up in the morning

Simbarashe: HAHAHAHAH!!!!!

me: i dont know whether to be upset or just laugh at myself

it really has taken me about 15 minutes from the time of realizing my problem to tryin to solve it

Simbarashe: I think laugh at yourself man,this is some funny stuff.

Sent at 11:16 PM on Monday

Simbarashe: 15 mins...dawg are you stayin in a dorm

Sent at 11:17 PM on Monday

me: yeah

ok i think it works, i hope it does

Simbarashe: Can't someone wake you up?

me: im to lazy to go up to my friends room and ask

noones online

my best bet would be someone in the US cuz they could call me

on that vonage line

Simbarashe: I like that someone 10000 miles away will call you to wake you up.Now thats funny!

me: haha who says technology makes things easier

Simbarashe: For real!

me: if i had a clock wit a crank id be asleep right now

Sent at 11:28 PM on Monday

Global Justice

I will be analyzing the argument of David Miller, "Against Global Egalitarianism" and I've realized the idea of ethics, justice, oppression and representation are where my passions lie as an academic. Often people give me the standard line about philosophy being boring or impractical, but to me its simply thinking things out. I jotted down a note to myself regarding philosophy and I think it captures what I mean in the previous sentence.

In philosophy we take on complex problems and only accept simple answers.

In unpacking this statement ideas of what we are obligated to do by virtue of our abilities to reason are what underly our attempts to lead fulfilling promising lifes. Ok I'm getting to abstract at the moment, but after I do this presentation and write this paper I'll make sure to post some clearer thoughts.

Its late and I need to sleep.

Shot out to the world, I got mad love for you.

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

756

Congratulations Barry and to all the haters, Hi Haters,

Saturday, August 4, 2007

Hip Hop

Courtesy of my good friend Pop, I recieved 4 mp3 CDs worth of the best from hip hop in '07 and it has changed my life. Ok not literally, but its reinvigorated me in a way that only music can. From the beat of Misunderstood on Common's new album, to the striking lyrics of Brother Ali on Uncle Sam Goddamn.

Hip hop has some serious flaws. The notions that hip hop is dead, stems from greater arguments about the over abundance of misogyny, materialism and other negative images being proliferated, especially in commercial or mainstream hip hop. But you don't need to look far to find great music. As Guru said on an interview with my boi DJ Hyphen, there is a lot of artists doing great things with hip hop, that is both creative and conscious. The notion that music is ever stagnant or dead is a complete fallacy. In fact saying its dead would be ignoring the negative things hip hop does, rather it needs to be examined as a medium that both reflects the norms of our society as well as shapes them.

The nature of the music industry as a whole is undergoing a huge transformation. With the use of internet spreading music like wildfire, people no longer seek music through the traditional channels of record stores. Rather most people access music electronically, often without compensating the artists in return which causes problems of how can music continue to provide the investment necessary to reproduce itself. As a true capitalist, even though there are lots of problematic aspects of capitalism that I recognize, I believe in this system to solve itself. There's a need to find a better or more efficient manner to deliver the type of variety in music people crave and it will be achieved if it is not being done so already. I know as a person who loves music I rely on my personal connections of people who have dedicated their lives to music to pass me the best of what they listen to. I listen to Sunday Night Sound Sessions that streams online live and is available for download on line to keep me up on some the up and coming artists and great music coming out.

The music is out there people just need to not be so reliant on clear channel and/or express themselves to clear channel demanding the type of content they want. The truth is clear channel decides what is played based on what they think they can sell or market. 50 Cent, Mariah Carey, Britney Spears, all are marketable images and have proven track records of selling records, don't knock them for selling, just recognize that other stuff doesn't sell for various reasons. I don't pretend to know the answers, I just know there are alternatives, seek them out. For those who read this blog that know more about music please feel free to comment and express your views.

ONE LOVe

Monday, July 30, 2007

Democracy???

The next couple months of my life will be dedicated to the idea of Democracy, more specifically what role decomcracy promotion should play in foreign policy, if any? My thesis will be examining the current Fiji situation that has seen a military coup step in, as it purports to be eliminating corruption from the government in hopes of returning the country to democracy at a later date, while facing international pressure to return to a democracy. Basic ethical questions emerge, such as do the ends justify the means? Or are precedents of coups something that riddle a state, as could be argued in Fiji as they have had 4 in the past 20 years.

A couple of reservations I have headed into this study follow below.
  • Is it the role of an outsider, paternal, government to push for democracy in another state?
  • Is democracy the best form of government? Often overlooked when thinking about democracy is how much work must go into it for it to be functional. Its like any relationship, when a state decides to wed democracy it doesn't mean that wedding signals the beginning of a long loving relationship, but rather just the signalling of a commitment that will be tried and tested by the events of the future and even the events of the past.

General questions I have to answer.

  • What role does democracy play in the securing of basic Human Rights?
  • What role does democracy play for greater international security?

As an American I am biased that I do have some faith in Democracy, but as a skeptical American I recognize the shortcomings of our political process. The truth is when there is no clear right or wrong decisions, no matter how those decisions are made, democratically or by virtue of a single decision maker, those decisions are not necessarily correct. In fact much of what is popular is not correct, just look at patriarcy.

HOLLA

Jena Six

Group of Six Black students facing charges for the beating of a white student after three nooses were hung from a tree in Jena, Louisianna.

To read the situation view the following links, then feel free to engage in discussion.

To see the news story read.
http://www.democracynow.org/article.pl?sid=07/07/10/1413220

To hear an interview conducted with the parents read.
http://www.democracynow.org/article.pl?sid=07/07/10/1413228

get at me

Washed Up

Ok, so today i played in an open gym run, talent level was mediocre as it is in New Zealand, however I can't say anything because I'm pretty sure in a combined 5 games to 7 I was 10 for 92. It got so bad that I started takin shots with my eyes closed, like mikemaines looking elsewhere when he shoots. Luckily my team helped me pull out a few wins, but I am officially a bum on the court and I'm ready to hear it from the peanut gallery.

Making things worse is I've actually worked myself into decent shape, not like basketball shape, but I can run open down the court now, so I can't blame it on conditioning. I can't blame it on not playing because I've been getting up at 6 a.m. twice a week to play. I think I'm going to get a Bruce Bowen jersey because thats pretty much my game at this point. I basically look forward to D-ing up the other teams best player. Holla at me and let me hear it, cuz I'm going to be a hooper again one day, it just may be when I finally have a kid and he begins to get close to getting a win against his pops.

HOLLA

Monday, July 23, 2007

Barry Bonds

Just to go on record as the great Barry Bonds is about to, yes great, the man is better than the handful of others we have chosen to celebrate during his career, I WANT BARRY TO BREAK THE RECORD.

Barry is better than McGwire, better than Ripken Jr., better than Griffey, these players we have taken time to herald as great. The difference between Barry and them is Barry doesn't care about what people think of him off the field, that is not to say he doesn't carry himself professionally, becuase he absolutely does, but that his image isn't for sale. Barry just wants to be a baseball player, not a pop icon, not a legend and most of all not poster boy for hamburgers.

During the 2002 World Series I had the privilege to watch Barry hit what was at the time a meaningless home run during Game 6 that pushed the lead to, if I recall correctly 5. Before that at bat as every other one of his at bats during the game I made sure I was in position to watch. I sat there with suspense, as if all the home runs he had hit prior to that didn't real mean that much because I had not seen him do it myself. However, he quickly showed me just what everyone of those home runs meant, especially that one, as I had just witnessed a man crush a ball at will during the most important time in his career. Now the Angels rally monkeyed past the Giants in that game and the series to win, but it is safe to say Barry performed phenomenally on the biggest stage. He hit balls so hard they disappeared from sight during the games in Anaheim.

As Barry turns to break the home run record, I'm left with that same suspense that filled me during the world series, is he going to do it? The only difference is from experience I now know the answer, of course he's going to do it and it is going to be amazing.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Don't be Jelly

Yo bois going to be in Samoa- Don't be jealous- HOLLA at me

Itinerary

Depart: Auckland 19 JUN- 1630
Arrive: Apia 18 JUN- 2310

Depart: Apia 29 JUN- 1030
Arrive: Pago Pago - 1105

Depart: Pago Pago 6 JUL- 1405
Arrive: Apia - 1450

Depart: Apia 6 JUL- 2225
Arrive: Auckland 8 JUL- 140

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Homesick and Sick of Home

Several things have come to my attention while being abroad. First, despite my easygoing nature, it is extremely difficult being away from home for an extended period of time. I used to wonder why people would get depressed or home sick, but now I realize just how easy it is for you to go up and down. I'm not writing this during a downpoint now, but I have seen my mood and demeanor switch as quickly as chone figgins stealing second. Shot out to Vlad's walk off home run against the Orioles today. I actually caught it on ESPN game cast, so I didn't see it, but saw a live update of the game as he homered, which was exciting for me since I have only been able to read stories following the games rather than getting to watch them for myself.

Second, why is it when I go abroad the Lakers want to implode? When I left in 2004 for South Africa the Lakers traded Shaq, I walked around for a week with my head down as I had a pit in my stomach like finding out my girlfriend was seeing another guy. Now Kobe is expressing the same frusturations all of us have felt as Laker fans in watching them fail to put together a contender around Kobe. I admit I was opposed to moving Bynum during the season, because I think he will be a legitimate center down the road. I realize though at the same time that getting another legit player to help us out is essential. I mean we are blessed nightly to be able to watch Kobe go nuts every night. He is by far and away the best player in the game. Big up to Lebron, but you're not KOBE, we'll see what goes down in San Antonio. Beyond the Lakers being in shambles, hopefully it being exposed will force it to be corrected, it just adds to the homesick/sickofhome feelings that I have to deal with on a daily basis. I recognize that these feelings also make everyday great so I'm not completely being negative, just sayin you got to work with those feelings whether good or bad and continue to take steps forward. Holla

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Twenty Three

I must say this birthday was markedly different from any I’ve had before. I began the day excited, just like wow I’m 23. Watched the Spurs beat the Suns, who I surprisingly rooted for because they were the lesser of two evils. GO UTAH! Played a little basketball, seriously one game up to 7 and I was already tired.


It’s just that this birthday I wasn’t with the people from home, my family and my friends. I’m not one to celebrate a birthday; to me it more or less feels the same as any other day.

My friends here threw me an excellent surprise as we dressed up and had a nice dinner at a tapas restaurant. Then we proceeded to Minus 5 an ice bar. I must admit it’s a novel experience and since it was free not half bad. We ended the night playing pool and listening to music and that’s all I can really ask for. Thank you to the friends I’ve made here in New Zealand, it was great to know I was appreciated, and better to share your company. HOLLA

Friday, May 11, 2007

Read This If You're White

My man simba takin his time once again to drop his knowledge upon us. Simba and Miles, first off let me mention that I miss stayin up and talkin about everything from Politics and Art.
Much of my education has been intellectualizing many of the issues brought up above and I basically bounce from an idealistically optimistic youn man who feels he can change the world to a pessimistic cynic who recognizes the systematic forces of white-supremacist-capitalist-hetero-sexist-patriarchy and more isms to be added.
I must admit during times of balanced thought I lean closer to the weight of the system being to great. In many ways the course of the world seems set, but let us not stop imagining actions or events that can change the course.
When I was in South Africa Simba provided me with the name of the father of the Black Conciousness movement Steve Biko, to this days his thoughts bounce around inside my head. I'd like to make a suggestion to those who find themselves in a similar subject posistion to myself that I have pulled from the thoughts of Biko.
Biko explains racism as a White Man's problem, but yet the problem places the burden upon those that it adversely effects. This type of set-up rings true for nearly all things. We live in a society that not only denies racism, but denies that they benefit from a system that has provided them with a privilege they have done nothing to earn. The only way to combat something like racism is raising a conciousness. Biko focused on Black people, attempting to create a positive representation of BLACK. I have realized that I have the attention of white conservatives, because of my ability to articulate myself on there level, therefore I have the ability to attack the system of racism, (i'd actually like to call it White supremacist- as it correctly points to the problem without hiding where the problem lies) by challenging those peoples views and giving them a framework for understanding privilege. I recognize that this idea has been one of the greatest lenses I have learned to look at the world with and know the power of it if you can give people that lens. It has the ability to raise conciousness. It has the ability to move the conversation of racism from the individuals where people argue that Tiger Woods and Denzel Washington are proof that racism doesn't exist, to looking at the systems of oppression that effect people collectively.
Only then can you point out to a person arguing that racism doesn't exist the historic legacy of country-clubs to deny access to blacks and women. Only then can you point out the stereotypical roles that black actors are forced to play time and time again.
In doing this you are challenging the system at the level where real change needs to occur.
One Love
I recently went through a bout of being down. The emotional high I experienced in Fiji was immediately dampered by a stark look at myself here in New Zealand. I came here to run basketball camps. I've done some coaching, mostly at affluent schools, but realize when I won this scholarship this is not what I envisioned. What I envisioned was what I experienced in Cape Town, no scratch that what I experienced in Khaylitsha, a township banished to the outskirts of the city. A place close enough to have people come into the city and work if their labor was needed, but far enough for those in the city to be ignored.

Well it was on a visit with Hoops4Hope that I realized that basketball was a legitimate way to visit these places and offer something I love to people who have basically been ignored, been pushed to the side, been stripped of oppurtunity. I realize that basketball is a way to offer people something more than what they had before. The previous sentence sounds simplistically stupid, I know I've read it four times already, but recognize that I know basketball isn't going to change the systematic oppression a population faces, yet it can be a channel that can be utilized to build confidence and maybe even community. So I repeat, that basketball way is a way to offer people something more than they had before. I know sport can provide confidence for an individual who rarely recieves compliments and provide a sense of community that has otherwise been mangled by alcohol and violence. However, Rotary did not send me to South Africa, I don't have the oppurtunity to work in Soweto, instead I am in Ponsonby, New Market and Papakura. I recognize that there is work to be done, there is always work to be done, but I also recognize my ability, and that I can put myself in positions that most cannot.

I enjoy as much privilege as anyone. I am white-male-hetero-sexual-english speaking-catholic and tall. I mean what more could I possibly ask for. I fall out of bed and know that I'm not going to be made fun of for the way I speak, not going to be touched in a manner I don't want to be, not going to be feared by the people I walk by. Its with this privilege that I still struggle to understand daily, that I recognize my whole life I've lived very selfishly. I rarely care for persons more than I care for myself. I've been focused entirely on improving my lot. Some would applaud saying I am driven and I would not disagree. However, I am now beginning to realize the people I may have ignored, because I wasn't sure I had enough to help. The friends I ignored when they attempted to share something with me that they had rarely shared before, but I was so busy thinking of myself that I didn't even hear them. I saw this scholarship as finally my chance to legitimize the motto I have lived much of my life by, "I will help people once I have a means to help them. I can choose to help people now and offer them peanuts or I can further myself and offer them steak." I only now realize the fallaciousness of this argument. You can't choose to help people later. You either help them then or you don't. Choosing not to help in certain instances hasn't allowed me to focus more on myself and gain more personally. It's only made me selfish. I could help others and still further myself. It may not be easy, but you can do whatever you want. That doesn't mean you can dunk if you are 5'2", it means that you can play basketball and go to school. I played basketball in college and went to school. I don't even think its really an achievement, but people always ask, how did you find time? Well easy I played basketball from 4:00 to 7:00 and then had the other 21 hours to do everything else. My studies didn't suffer because I had a three hour a day time commitment. Just like they wouldn't have suffered if I listened to my friend just a little bit closer instead of listening to the song playing in the background.

My chance to help people is now. My chance to help people will hopefully be later as well. I even hope I am a better position with more resources at my disposal when I help people in my future, but I know now that it is my time to do what I can do. The time is now. As D-Hubb said, "Stop bein a spectator, get in the game." I may not be in South Africa, but I can do work here. I can also look for oppurtunities in the future to do more work. Helping is both now and later, just make sure you're doing something now because your kidding yourself if you say oh I'll do it later. HOLLA

Economics of Tourism

Nothing is more disheartening than going to a place where there entire culture has been commodified. When traveling in Fiji, I experienced the luxuries of the Sofitel Hotel only to realize it was the most boring, least intellectually stimulating place to be on earth. Everything from the "Bula" (hello) to the smile is intended to make you feel relaxed, to hide the plight of this employee, who only can access this place as an employee. Imagine being a child in Nadi, Victoria Falls, or Montego Bay and seeing nothing but poverty surrounding you except foreigners on a leisurely vacation. How preverse a picture is that for a child? Not to mention when you compound that image of class privilege, with race (who's really travelling).

I get sick to my stomach going to cultural villages, because its the saddest form of interaction ever. People go thinking there gaining a knowledge of a culture when really they're paying money to see people sing and dance (shuck and jive). I'm not criticizing or belittling peoples art and culture, but arguing that the socio-economic position of these people leave them very little option to support themselves. Its not like people chose to sing and dance for you, its that they are in such a dire need for money to pay for basic human needs that they slang anything they got. We just happen to pay for a little song and dance and feel good about ourselves because were getting a glimpse at authentic ______ (fill in the blank) culture. HOLLA and IM OUT

Friday, May 4, 2007

The F- the I- the J- the I- Its FIJI (hold up)

Ok real spit yo boi needed something to really wake me up and I think I found it in Fiji. I attended a Rotary Conference that was suprisingly alright, but it my trip really didnt begin till the day after the conference ended.

Well first I met my main man from Pomona College, Tremor class of '02, rotary ambassadorial scholar of '04 who spent the year of the scholarship and the last 3 years at the University of South Pacific doin really big thangs- like water projects to provide fresh clean water to different villages. PS- shot out to the next generation of Pomona College graduates '07, I know you guys are going to hit the real world real hard, best of luck and congratulations.

So after spending the conference at resort (which I really find problematic- people say they've been to fiji and never left the premises of the Sofitel Resort if you feel me on this or disagree wit me leave a comment and we can converse) I went to perhaps one of the wealthiest families in Fiji's home to traveling to Yusama Village a place more reflective of the "real" fiji. The word real is poor diction on my part as it brings into play all kinds of notions of authenticity that I really want to avoid. The drawing out that I would like to stress is that I din not find myself in a place entirely set up to cater to my every whim on the basis of my money or more identifiably my skin. In Yusama I was welcomed into a home, offered fruit and introduced to a beautiful two year old baby. It was an experience that I fail to capture in words, but leaves you in solitude as you are paralyzed by the realization of the privileges you've taken for granted, while simultaneously warmed by the ability of people to interact.

I was honored after my trip to Yusama to visit a 26 acre sugar cane farm, where I was greeted with the warmest hug, I've recieved since leaving my mothers arms at the airport. They cut me a piece of sugar cane, and invited me back to work the harvest, an invitation I hope I can take up, as I'm unsure if I'll be able to even last one day. I'm attempting to finish this post after the fact, and realizing that I cannot capture the feelings being removed somewhat from it. The memory is with me, but not in the manner in which I can convey with words. So I shall publish...

Monday, April 23, 2007

Longest Day

aight so today has man been a day that never came into focus. I went through the motions tryin to regain some semblance of a routine, but somehow didn't approach those things with the same passion I normally do. While coaching i felt like my energy had been zapped. I found myself only being able to rally up the energy for the kids in small doses, luckily I had a very capable coach with me who made up for my lack of energy, but why is that after a vacation you're more tired then when you left?

After coaching I had to argue about money, never a fun thing and although no blame should be shouldered by one party, its frusturating when the final aggreement makes neither party happy. Thats all I'm going to say on that subject because of its sensitivity to some readers.

After that I had a chat and a soda with my Rotary host who helped remind me of what my priorities should be my studies, basketball, then rotary and then the overarching concern now that I'm in the real world money- POMONA COLLEGE WAS NOT THE REAL WORLD, every meal prepared housing, electricity, internet, all taken care or. Oh how i miss those days.

Real spit though i got so much going on in my life at the moment and I dont know how to use this journal to best express those things.

1) My Girlfriend- enough said
2) School- I need a thesis topic and to begin researching- two possibilities
a) indigenous rights
b) or illegal human trafficking for sexual purposes
I'm leaning towards (b). Let me know if you have any thoughts

3) Basketball- I'm coaching little kids who I have a blast doing it but to no fault of there own they are not the population that I really want to coach, in that they are affluent. What an odd feeling, and where does that come from? Is it more noble to work with kids from impoverished communities? I'd say so, but then again why do I feel entitled to enter those communities and work for them. Is it a recognition that I can enter and should embrace that privilege, especially as one who grew up amongst an impoverished community. Really I have an oppurtunity here, to work with any population I want, but for the first time I have to seek out the impoverished community rather than starting there as I have and trying to break into the elite society. Its like from going from the city of Pomona to Pomona College I established myself as a person with ties to all the privileges that go to a prestigious university or college and now don't see myself as a poor kid workin hard to break into the rich kids club. Thats a first for me, I have this new feeling of having money but with it comes a complete change in how I define myself. I've always taken pride in being poor, because I knew I could achieve anything. Now I achieve something that gives me some money this scholarship and now I'm unsure how to define myself. I'm like a rapper who signs a record deal, do I lose all legitimacy now that I'm paid. Am I so departed from my community that I can't go back? I doubt that and would hate that if that was the case, but its just odd knowing on which side of the fence I'll lie. I guess the best thing is that I know with this new echelon of privilege I've pushed my way into I can actually begin to challenge this segment of the population to discuss why I shouldn't be painted as an example of the American Dream- one person overcoming odds- but rather one person who can see the odds and see why it screws thousands of people daily. OK squash that rant

This list may also reflect the first time basketball was not my first priority, another departure from how I've defined myself in the past. But thats another conversation.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Still Alive

Hey Yall- I am still breathin despite jumpin off three bridges in the span of 5 days. P.S. I haven't sky dived yet! but will be doing so in the future, those pictures of me are of me harnessing up for a bungy jump. I'll give a more detailed account to everyone when I get back to auckland. One Love

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Kobe

Okay so today I procrastinated my entire day away, while I should have been writing, I watched youtube videos, checked myspace, checked facebook, emails, even checked my own blog (yes its that hot), and one thing has stuck out. Well two things, Florida is that good, but the real thing is KOBE is that good. I hate opening up ESPN.com and seeing Dwayne Wade practiced, good for him. I've returned to practice many a times in my day and never recieved a collumn about it. I even hobbled through warm ups just to be a part of the game, now thats heart. No real spit though, mad props to Dwayne Wade he is great, he won his title did his thing, my only thing is KOBE is the truth. Why are we seeing headlines like McGrady carries team to victory with 24 points, while Kobe scores 43 in a win and its called dissapointing. P.S. I missed Kobe against Houston, but I heard he did not dissapoint. As I watched Kobe's highlights today though, you can't help but marvel at his basketball ability. Yes, to all the haters he's that good, even if you don't like him you know everytime he shoots you expect it to go in. You'd be foolish not too, he's made you feel dumbfounded one to many times to expect that shot not to drop. Thats it, till next time.

Monday, April 2, 2007

Hot Sauce i mean Hot Water

Holla from the Coramandel peninsula. Quiggs, Andrew, Kristen and Marta, drove about 2 hours to Coramandel Town which was probably about 140 kilometers then another 2 hours to Port Jackson which was probably about 60 kilometers of just gravel road. It didnt help that the car, named Donna- pronounced with a Norwegian accent, probably only had a couple of inches clearance from the ground since it was loaded with the 5 of us, plus our camping gear, plus clothes, plus food. Needless to say every ping and scrape sound made the 5 of us cringe worried the muffler was going to fall off poor Donna as we crawled along the street at less than 20 kph. I must say that Donna proved her worth again as she must have numerous times before being a 1988 Toyota Corona, that runs like Darren Collison (good run UCLA, Florida is that tough).

Anyways the long trip there was worth it as we spent the entire next day on the beach wandering around and takin in the fact we had this entire beach to ourselves. Sunday we spent pursuing a trail to hike as well as what we thought would be a brief stop to the Hot Water Beach. It turned to be another long drive and we ended up just spending the day on the Hot Water Beach. Now you may be asking what is a "Hot Water Beach?" Well theres a natural hot spring under ground that seeps up onto the beach right where the tide of the ocean comes up. Supposedly you can dig a whole and sit in it like a hot tub, we were there to late to accomplish that but we felt the hot water springs and they were scalding hot. We even sat in them for some time as the waves crashed on us and pushed us off them. But it was the first beach where I saw some solid waves. Waves that just crashed on you and you could dive under, not the measly waves of resort towns or resort beaches, but ones where if you can't swim you shouldn't be in the water. Note I did see some serious waves at Bethel Beach on the west coast outside of Auckland, but those waves were so ridiculous you could not swim in them.

This shall be my last post for a couple weeks at least as I'm headed for a two week tour of the South Island, which promises to have everything from Wine Tasting, Hiking to Bungy Jumping crammed into it. After which I'll come back attend a couple classes and leave for 5 days in Fiji, enough said.

Monday, March 26, 2007

5-4-3-2-1-JUMP

Oh yeah I forgot to mention last weekend I jumped of the Harbor Bridge here in Auckland. It was very different from my previous bungy jump in that it was much shorter, and that I actually went completely under water. My suggestion to everyone is you should give the bungy jump thing a try, because it is a lot of fun, plus people will think you're crazy, dumb, or a combination of the two for doing so.

Staying Busy with Basketball

Today I've started my third week at Strathalan School in Papakura. Its great to be able to work with the same group of kids over a sustained period, because of the relationship you can build with them. I've been amazed at how much they've been able to absorb. I started with just a jumpstop and now they are pivoting and protecting the ball, probably doesn't sound like a lot to the casual fan, but to help put it in perspective that skill set is something that kids in the US don't really get a grasp on until high school, at least I did not. The other thing that amazes me is how much they remember. I only work with a group for 30-45 minutes a week and then don't see them until the next week and I can jump in and ask them what is a jump stop, pivot or defensive stance and they'll immediately jump into it. A couple days ago some students from Freeman's Bay came in for an afterschool program at Youthtown and I found a group of 5 of them playing shaq says on there own time, it was a moment of recognition that a simple game I brought from a basketball camp at the University of La Verne to New Zealand is fun no matter where you do it.

On a leisurely note, I travelled to the Bay of Islands, where I went out on a sail boat around the islands and even squeezed in a round of golf in plain view of the Bay, very scenic. Anyone that thinks golf isn't a sport I challenge you to go out and play 18 holes and get at me the next day to let me know how you feel physically. Then we can debate. Thats it for now, stay tuned for some pictures.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Capitol City

I spent this weekend in Wellington, the capitol of New Zealand and have reached several conclusions, some more relevant than others.

First, museums are alright, just alright. It is great to be able to walk around and see objects, in a museum, but they seem so removed from their setting. For example today I saw a replica of a Maori canoe, but it was held up on a pedestal and tilted at an angle as if it was floating in the air like Peter Pan's ship. Despite the carvings on the canoe being worth a viewing, the canoe cannot come to life to me as a viewer unless I were to see it in action. I need to see the canoe in the water, or at least outside.

Second, there are some amazingly talented people in this world. It was the first time since college where I got to be held in the same room with exceptional students, with dreams, hopes and aspirations to change the world. I participated in an orientation for fellow Rotary Ambassadorial Scholars, and was awe struck by peoples projects that ranged from wave energy to teacher quality. I'd like to thank those involved in the weekend for making it a special place, a think tank of people networking to help facilitate eachothers experience while here in New Zealand and hopefully further beyond this short 9 month scholarship period.

Third, I have great ideas, do great things, and may even be a great person, but it is a constant struggle to make sure you put your best foot forward and not get lost along the way. The journey has always just begun, beginning constantly, never ends. The struggle is whats fun, may I never stop struggling. HOLLA

Thursday, March 1, 2007

The First Week

As I have completed my first week of classes at the University of Auckland, I guess I have officially settled into my new home for the next year. I've dialed in my room, hung up a map of New Zealand and a random SlamUp of AI in a Nuggets uniform, bought things like plates and silverware for the first time in my life, and set up my computer with speakers. All the things a 22 year old would need in his small dorm.

This week beyond going to classes I introduced myself to a new organization that is attempting some new exciting programs for kids with basketball, Youthtown. I joined the coordinator and another player younger than me to coach at a youth camp for children with moderate to severe physical and learning disorders. I was excited just being in a gym and with kids who wanted to play some basketball. I had a great time, but one thing happened that I'm still thinking about. As the kids were playing this one kid ran the ball like 10 feet out of bounds so I called out, in order to keep the two teams on our court and not spilling into the court next to us. I got the ball and handed it to a player on the opposing team to begin play, when the kid that ran up came up to me and yelled at me, saying he was just trying to score. I tried to just encourage him to keep tryin to score and not be discouraged because this time he went out of bounds. After our brief exchange I didn't think about it again until he came up to me after all the games were over and apologized for yelling at me. It was one of the most genuine apologies I have ever recieved. This kid didn't need to apologize because I had already dismissed the incident, but yet he took it upon himself to apologize for getting caught in the heat of the moment and yelling. It struck me and I don't know if I even know its significance yet.